Weiner’s Twitter Tweak


…Between Occam’s Razor (it’s Weiner’s junk, and he tweeted it) and Occam’s Lip-Syncher (the ghost-tweeter did it) lies a third possibility — that the tweets aren’t by Weiner but the Twitpic crotch shot to the cute co-ed is. The republic’s “citizen-legislators” do hardly anything for themselves these days, starting with reading the thousand-page legislation they cheerily pass, but if they can’t even perform their own sex scandals there really is no point to them. For the last quarter of 2010, Weiner listed 19 staffers, a few with highly specific job descriptions (“Deputy Director of Immigration Affairs”) but most with the kind of blandly nebulous titles (“Staff Assistant”) that could cover almost anything, including in-house ghost-tweeting. For the sake of argument, let us take it as read that American men are e-mailing their genitals across the fruited plain all day long, and that in the nature of these things one or two attachments go awry and wind up in the inbox of the elderly spinster who runs the quilting bee and you have to make a rather sheepish apology. Congressmen are among the few in this land who, in such a situation, can breezily say, as Weiner did to CNN’s Dana Bash, “You have statements that my office has put out.” Herein lies the full horror of American politics in the death throes of the republic: A congressman has nothing better to do of an evening than tweet his crotch to coeds, but he requires an “office” with “staffers” to “put out” “statements” on the subject.

When Weiners have staffers, it’s very difficult to have limited government: You cannot have a small state run by big Weiners. If you require an “office” to issue “statements” about your tweets, it’s hardly surprising you’re indifferent to statist bloat elsewhere.

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As the elitist society of Washington DC grows more aloof and separated from the real people, it evolves more and more into a modern re-creation of the ancient Roman government (that fell mostly due to the corruption, perks, debauchery of greed and wealth, and it’s inability to continue to sensibly run the empire). Wiener is simply another elitist mouthpiece who has joined the ranks of the socialites of Machiavellian excess.

Perhaps we should spend some of the boarder funds to encircle Washington DC. Lock that crowd in, and start over electing a new American Government. Comprised of real, down-home Americans who have lived with the middle and lower classes, Who aren’t afraid to get dirty to get the job done right. And who understand the difference between a Statesman, a politician, and a carpetbagger.