sundance:
Against the backdrop of a sanctions announcement, President Obama’s administration has released a Joint Analysis Report claiming to outline the details of Russia’s involvement hacking into targeted political data base or computer systems during the election.
Except it doesn’t.
Not even a little.
The “Russian Malicious Cyber Activity – Joint Analysis Report” (full pdf below) is pure nonsense. It outlines nothing more than vague and disingenuous typical hacking activity that is no more substantive than any other hacking report on any other foreign actor.
This might as well be a report blaming Nigerian fraud phone solicitors for targeting U.S. phone numbers. DUH! Just because your grandma didn’t actually win that Nigerian national lottery doesn’t mean the Nigerian Mafioso are targeting your employer to hold you accountable for her portion of the bill.
This FBI report is, well, quite simply, pure horse-pucky.
However, what the report does well is using ridiculous technical terminology to describe innocuous common activity. Example: “ATPT29” is Olaf, the round faced chubby guy probably working from his kitchen table; and “ATPT28” is his unemployed socially isolated buddy living in Mom’s basement down the street.
This paragraph is priceless in it’s humorous and disengenuous gobblespeak: