by The Babylon Bee
PHILADELPHIA, PA — Americans across the country breathed a sigh of relief this morning following news broke that Vice President Kamala Harris had survived an attempted interview.
The incident took place late yesterday afternoon during a campaign stop in Pennsylvania when a rogue reporter reportedly approached the vice president and fired off several questions before being tackled to the ground and subdued by Secret Service agents. Harris was quickly evacuated from the area and taken to a secure location.
“Thankfully, Vice President Harris is safe and in stable condition,” a campaign spokesperson said. “We all feared the worst when that crazed person emerged from the crowd and attempted to interview the sitting U.S. vice president right there in broad daylight. Someone must be looking out for her, though, because she avoided suffering any damage in the incident.”
The FBI arrived at the scene shortly thereafter and discovered that the would-be interviewer was in possession of several notepads, pens, a cellphone, and a camera authorities believed was intended to capture the event for a livestream or video. “Isn’t that sick?” said a campaign insider.
What can possibly be the thought process behind voting for such an abysmally stupid, lying airhead? She is nothing but the perfect puppet for the far left.