19 Apr

Jack Bauer For Press Secretary

Oh man, I nearly fell outta my chair laughing at this: (via GOP & The City)

Top 10 Changes Jack Bauer Would Bring to the White House Press Corps

  • 10. Positive stories about Bush increase 145% in his first hour alone.
  • 9. Five moles weeded out of press corps by Bauer.
  • 8. Ask a stupid question; get hooked up to the sensory deprivation device.
  • 7. Podium replaced with bullet-proof barrier with gun ports.
  • 6. All press conferences last an hour, with all tough questions coming at 45 minutes past the hour.
  • 5. By the end of a press conference, a minimum of 34 people would have been killed.
  • 4. “No comment” replaced by “We don’t have time for that question”.
  • 3. Gary Bauer mistakenly showed up to a press conference, once.
  • 2. All comments will be yelled.
  • 1. Blogs4Bauer starts to live-blogs press conferences.
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About Curt

Curt served in the Marine Corps for four years and has been a law enforcement officer in Los Angeles for the last 20 years.
This entry was posted in Humor, Politics. Bookmark the permalink. Wednesday, April 19th, 2006 at 1:09 pm
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